the poisoned apple

I broke my record of eating apples. For the past four days, I have eaten one medium-sized fuji apple as part of my lunch. That's a whopping FOUR apples. Before that, I haven't eaten four apples in the last four years.

Freak. No, I just have an extreme distaste for apples that might even be called hatred. What bothers me so much is the crunchiness. Don't get me wrong. I don't like mushy or soft bruised apples and I'm certainly not against the actual apple taste (though I don't think there's anything amazing about it). It's just the sound and sensation of teeth sinking into the crisp red flesh that makes me want to cringe. It reminds me of chalk scraping on chalkboard. No, it's more like teeth grinding sharply on a scratchy surface.

Once you get through the apple skin (chalkboard), there's the actual flesh, which I almost dislike as much as the skin. It's not soft or soothing. Rather, the white grainy flesh has a sandy, rough texture with juice trapped inside its pores and only released upon more crunching and scraping. To avoid any misunderstanding, let me tell you that I like soft juicy fruits (all popular fruit except for apples fall into this category) that don't make whining noises when I try to eat them. It's beside the point that oranges, peaches, bananas, watermelon all taste better than apples, in my humble opinion.

Why did Eve choose to eat the apple? When she touched the hard, unyielding apple on the tree, how could she have not sensed that something was wrong? Instead, she picked it off the tree, gave half of it to the man she loved, and ate the other half. Dear God. Why couldn't she have stuck to her oranges and peaches?

I could go on and mention Snow White, but I'll refrain. It just escapes me why the apple has been exalted and glorified throughout history and still occupies a large chunk of everyday life. I brought an apple to work today, but I just couldn't do it. I couldn't make myself take a bite out of that hard, rosy surface and hear the accompanying crunch.