oh kiwi!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sdUUx5FdySs

borat...sigh

I was dragged to see Borat today. All I can say is that the movie supported my theory that men should wear as much clothing as humanly possible. Period. Especially if their legs look like hairy sticks or if they weigh 500 lbs and are covered in about 10 layers of surrounding insulation. I cannot describe how much I wanted to puke after I watched that scene. Probably more than when I finished my 7 hour extended happy hour tonight in an effort to forget the image of hairy stick and lardo locked in the 69 position. Yeah...

Having never watched the Ali G show or any of Cohen's other brainchildren, I still knew what to expect (Hanging out with guys for lunch every day will do that to you). Sure, the jokes were crass and offensive, but this scene was just horrendous. I like some innocent humor and slightly off-color humor once in a while, but this was just over the top. The fact that some people rated Borat as their favorite movie of all time and its more than favorable reviews disturbed me just a little bit. Is America moving in a new direction that I'm simply not aware of? How can stuff like this possibly be inspiring? Borat was rated higher than Gladiator on IMDB and Rotten tomatoes. WTF?

How can we possibly live in a culture that rates racist jokes and fat naked men higher than soldiers getting their faces chopped off with an ax and wearing short skirts? What has America come to? Why must we exchange gratuitous violence and incest for Jewish jokes, female jokes, and more incest? What happened to blood and honor? Ah well. I suppose it's all for the people.

politically flavored cheesesteaks

The most hilarious cheesesteak place ever...deep in the heart of South Philly and across the street from Pat's, an equally famous place.

Walking along Geno's, the first thing you notice is entire walls covered with police badges from every town, city, and cornfield in the country. Smack in the middle is a picture of some police lieutenant who was killed by Ali Mujahedeen or Muhammed Jafar or whoever in 1981...I really wonder which way the owners voted in the midterm elections. Geno's is famous for putting up a sign that stated: We do not serve customers who don't speak English...talk about neoconservative.

The cheesesteaks themselves are slightly dry, with no sauce. I can't say that I was too impressed. Try ordering in the Philly lingo. Default is wiz. There's wiz with/without, American with/without, and Provolone with/without. Glory to cheese wiz and onions...Then again, since Oprah, Nsync, Michelle Kwan, and various other celebrities have been to Geno's, maybe this dry rendition of sad cheesesteaks ought to be right.

gelato heaven

I have never had such scrumptious, mouth-watering, divine gelato in my life. CapoGiro Gelato Artisans have two spots in Philly and more than three hundred flavors...since I'm going to be here for five years, I should be able to taste all of them if I try one every five or so days:)

On Friday night, I got the Chocolate Scuro, which is the dark, rich, and bittersweet chocolate. It is the best chocolate I have ever had in my life. I was groaning so much while I was eating it that my friends got slightly worried...it was better than anything I've ever experienced...

Anyway, it's a must visit place in Philadelphia. Here are some of the intriguing/mouthwatering flavors:

Pear with Bourbon
Avocado
Honeysuckle
Caped Gooseberry
Mexican Chocolate
Burnt Sugar
Pomegranate
Apple Cider with Clove
Blood Orange
Mascarpone and Fig

losing my head and everything in between

Oh dear God, what the fuck is wrong with me? I went to the bookstore an hour ago to look around. In front of the cash register, I reached into my bag and realized that my wallet was missing. More frantic groping came up with nothing. I raced back to my room, swept over everything in my desk, only to find no wallet. Then it was a mad dash to the bookstore and realizing that someone must have stolen it.

Back in my room, I promptly cancelled all of my credit cards and ATM cards, then called my dad to deal with my missing driver's license. I guess I sounded like I was on the edge of a gigantic breakdown, because he was ubernice and supportive. I tried to figure the stupid DMV stuff for ten minutes, then my dad asked me if I had looked on my bed and around the room. Of course, my wallet was in the second drawer from the top of my desk. Then I did have my mental breakdown and started sobbing like there was no tomorrow because in my utter stupidity, I keep my brass rat in my wallet and I thought I had lost it. Apparently men don't like hysterical and teary females because my dad told me that he wanted to go back to watching his basketball game.

I have never felt so relieved. or stupid. ever. Jesus Christ. Maybe I'll even find that swimsuit that I lost a few days ago. I'm just beyond annoyed because I'm so careless with everything. It was even worse when I was little. Sometimes, it seems to me that my subconscious wants to be careless . I could fill a mausoleum with everything that I've misplaced over the years (if I could find them). Good God. And maybe I should appreciate my parents more for putting up with me.