1. Your potential friend (male) asks you (male) if you wear long-sleeve shirts to cover up your arm hair.
2. When you try to sit across the table from your potential friend, he shifts so that he's sitting next to you and explains that he needs his space and can't make direct eye contact with you.
3. Your potential friend thinks that you're his weekly ESL teacher.
4. You accidently get at least 50 calls and incoherent messages a day from your new friend who can't figure out how to work his cell phone and your name just conveniently happened to be Aardvark.
5. Your potential friend has a habit of spitting all over people's faces when he's drunk.
6. Your potential friend asks you why you don't shower. When you retort that you shower twice a day, he promptly tells you that his kids won't have clean water because of you.
7. When you joke about wanting to see what your potential friend's classes are like, he emails you his entire schedule complete with suggestions.
8. While at lunch with your potential friend, he tells you that his father once told him that there are only two things in life that men should handle with their hands, chickens and women.
9. Your potential friend calls you to invite you over to his apartment to watch the super bowl. Ten minutes later, he calls you back and tells you that there's no more space at his place.
10. You can't decide whether or not to start a conversation with a guy, mainly because he's been standing over the serving tray of sausages for the last twenty minutes, has two sausages sticking out of his mouth, and is glancing around to see whether anyone notices him.
1 comment:
KICK HIM IN THE BALLS!
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